Let me hold you for the last time
It’s the last chance to feel again
But you broke me
Now I can’t feel anything

When I love you, rings so untrue
I can’t even convince myself
When I’m speaking, it’s the voice of someone else

Oh it tears me up
I try to hold on, but it hurts too much
I try to forgive, but it’s not enough to make it all ok

You can’t play on broken strings
You can’t feel anything
that your heart don’t want to feel
I can’t tell you something that ain’t real
Oh the truth hurts
A lie’s worse
How can I give anymore
When I love you a little less than before

Oh what are we doing
We are turning into dust
Playing house in the ruins of us
Running back through the fire
When there’s nothing left to save
It’s like chasing the very last train
when it’s too late, too late

Oh it tears me up
I try to hold on but it hurts too much
I try to forgive, but it’s not enough to make it all ok

You can’t play on broken strings
You can’t feel anything
That your heart don’t want to feel
I can’t tell you something that ain’t real
Oh the truth hurts
A lie’s worse
I cannot give any more
When I love you a little less than before

Oh we’re running through the fire
When there’s nothing left to save
It’s like chasing the very last train
When we both know it’s too late

You can’t play on broken strings
You can’t feel anything
That your heart don’t want to feel
I can’t tell you something that ain’t real
Oh the truth hurts
A lie’s worse
I cannot give any more
When I love you a little less than before

Let me hold you for the last time
It’s the last chance to feel again

Just thinking about how fucked up we women actually are...
My roommate just got a sms from his girlfriend, kinda stating that he should come this weekend, she cant take it...
"She's got reasons he dont"
Feeling really sorry because that like the kind of act that i would pull off....
Called Gary to tell him that i'm sorry, cause i know exactly what she want to say, but when you watch your roommate cry you just feel like crap pulling such things off - but how can you fix brainfuck like this?
, and he just said, cant live with you cant live without you....
I gotta try too stop doing this to other people, it makes me feel so bad, to see how T. is so sad because - frankly (i know what im talking about) somebody has a very small ego.....

It's HARD but it has to work!!!!! This other thing is not an option!

This calls for Halleluja!

I'm not quite sure what to feel right now. I want to be in control, but i feel like im losing it more and more each day.
Just heard from my best friend that my other (male) friend has bin toughing me up while i was to drunk to realize it on friday.
OK that feel kinda weird. I mean, i like the thought that somebody wants me - but not him - and not like that.

J. apparently loves me

Well ain't that fucking great

I'm so fucked up i don't know what i want - what to think...

Kinda miss The Ex, but do i really?
Lately i don't know which feelings i have are true and which ones are just memories, imaginary things that i would like in my dreams but never in real life....



This girl I know needs some shelter
She don't believe anyone can help her
She's doing so much harm, doing so much damage
But you don't want to get involved
You tell her she can manage
And you can't change the way she feels
But you could put your arms around her

I know you want to live yourself
But could you forgive yourself
If you left her just the way
You found her

You left me hanging from a thread
We once were from together
I lick my wounds but I can
Never see them getting better
Something’s gotta change
Things cannot stay the same



Jones and i are finished. So finished

Sometimes I cry so hard from pleading
So sick and tired of all the needless beating
But baby when they knock you
Down and out
It's where you oughta stay

So fix your eyes and get up
Better get up
While you can

When you go
Would you have the guts to say
"I don't love you
Like I loved you
Yesterday"

What happened? How did i end up like this again?


Should I feel a moment with you
To softly whisper
I crave nothing else so much
Longing to reveal
Total honesty
I can feel your touch
I'm reaching out in this mourning air

Oh my god, it's just so much pain. He called and effectively kept repeating for an hour how sorry he is and so on and on and on and on.
I'm meeting with mr. Jones in less than an hour and i'm drunk and (i wish) all cried out. Don't really know what to do right now. A part of me just wants to jump out of the window and just end this pain. He said he was sorry but i just think he was waiting for me to end the call - which i ultimatly did - Drama queen, always was, always will be; apparently.... this time i'm coming down
Doesn't feel that good really, i would like to be anything but a dramaqueen.
He has somebody else, met her 2 weeks ago, so now he realised that he dosn't need me hanging on anymore.
'Cause baby, ooh, if heaven calls, I'm coming, too
Just like you said, you leave my life, I'm better off dead
It's just so fucked up to be so sad.
Now the drugs don't work
They just make you worse

I wish somebody could help

Believe i'm breaking my personal record in crying-on-somebody-different's-shoulder-every-night

Had my former best friend U. visiting yesterday - started off really nice, i went on rambling about my problems for about 2 hours untill i did the "and-how-are-you-doing"-thing and she said, well you know we wanted to get pregnant but now i have this gland-diseace and i have to wait untill the medication is working otherwise the child will be misformed.....

All i could think was, you selfish bitch, you just go on about yourself and never stop once to ask your friend how things are and even worse your "bestfriend" dont call you anymore to tell you she's sick.
That is just so sad!

Unfortunately later we got to the topic of the-ex and i tried to stop but ended up crying my eyes out - again.
She left at half past twelve and i just felt like a piece of shit and actually still do...

I'm going to the library now and i'm going to try to get my act together