So much happened so much pain, so much i haven't been able to write.
I hope it getting better now, but im not sure.



He walks you say sit down it’s just a talk
He smiles politely back at you
You stare politely right on through
Some sort of window to your right
As he goes left and you stay right
Between the lines of fear and blame
And you begin to wonder why you came

Let him know that you know best
Cause after all you do know best
Try to slip past his defense
Without granting innocence
Lay down a list of what is wrong
The things you’ve told him all along
And pray to God he hears you

He will do one of two things
He will admit to everything
Or he’ll say he’s just not the same
And you’ll begin to wonder why you came

Where did I go wrong, I lost a friend
Somewhere along in the bitterness
And I would have stayed up with you all night
Had I known how to save a life

People I have lost:
X.
B.
C.
J.
A.
A.
A.
E.l (guess i lost him before that)
Mom-in-law
Paps-in-law
1. Brother-in-law
2. Brother-in-law
1. Sister-in-law
2. Sister-in-law
Eh Nephew-in-law
Cousin-in-law

OK thats like 16 people out of my life, its like "ok have a nice life"

Oh my god he is just such an asshole

The-Ex just send me the following sms:

Hallo [myname], thank you for the bike, im sorry but i cannot imagine that we will ever be able to be a pair again. I like you and it hurts but i have made up my mind. All the best and perhaps ill see you soon. Love [insert name]

I'm about ready too jump out the window now........

Pages like this are just a big fat slap in the face http://www.wikihow.com/Handle-Excruciating-Pain

Just went to the-exs place delivering off the racingbike which he was supposed to have picked up about seven times.
Guess i was kinda hoping that he would be home but of course he wasn't...
Now i'm just feeling sick to my heart and like a really fat cow.




I'm lying alone with my head on the phone
thinking of you 'till it hurts
I know you hurt too but whatelse can we do
tormented and torn apart
I wish I could carry your smile in my heart
Times when my life seems so low
It would make me believe what tomorrow could bring
when today doesn't really know doesn't really know

I'm all out of love I'm so lost without you
I know you were right believing for so long
I'm all out of love what am I without you
I can't be too late to say that I was so wrong

I want you to come back and carry me home
away from these long lonely nights
I'm reaching for you are you feeling it too
does the feeling seem oh so right
And what would you say if I'd call on you now
And say that I can't hold on
there's no easy way it gets harder each day
please love me or I'll be gone

Oh what are you thinking of
what are you thinking of

I'm all out of love I'm so lost without you
I know you were right believing for so long
I'm all out of love what am I without you
I can't be too late I know that I was so wrong

And if I only could,
I'd make a deal with God,
And I'd get him to swap our places,
Be running up that road,
Be running up that hill,
Be running up that building.
Say, If I only could